“Blame is easier than pain. But only pain can be healed.”
Blame has a purpose. It directs our hurt outward. It gives the pain a name, a target.
But beneath blame is often something quieter: sadness. Longing. Betrayal. A wound that wasn’t witnessed.
And while blame may feel righteous, it rarely leads to relief.
*What if you let the blame rest — just for a moment — and asked what’s really there?*
What were you hoping they’d say?
What part of you still feels unseen?
What is this anger covering?
You don’t need to absolve anyone. But you *can* stop giving them the center of your story.
Let yourself step out of the loop. Not because they deserve it — but because *you do.*
*There is life waiting beyond blame. There is healing beneath it.*
Sit in stillness and bring to mind someone you’ve blamed. Notice the feelings that arise — anger, hurt, confusion. Breathe deeply and ask inwardly: 'What is underneath this blame?' Wait. Listen. Let the deeper truth emerge — without judgment.
Write a letter (just for you) starting with: 'I blame you for…' Write freely. Then write a second letter starting with: 'What I really needed was…' Compare them. See what new truth wants to be seen.
Avery J. “I was so stuck in blame. It made me feel powerful — but also exhausted. When I looked underneath it, I realized I was just hurt. Really deeply hurt. And once I gave *that* a voice, something began to shift. It felt honest for the first time.”
Blame protects the wound. But compassion heals it.